Page 1 Page 2 Page 3 Page 4 Page 5 Page 6 Page 7 Page 8 Page 9 Page 10 Page 11 Page 12 Page 13 Page 14 Page 15 Page 16 Page 17 Page 18 Page 19 Page 20 Page 21 Page 22 Page 23 Page 24 Page 25 Page 26 Page 27 Page 28 Page 29 Page 30 Page 31 Page 32 Page 33 Page 34 Page 35 Page 36 Page 37 Page 38 Page 39 Page 40 Page 41 Page 42 Page 43 Page 44 Page 45 Page 46 Page 47 Page 48 Page 49 Page 50 Page 51 Page 52 Page 53 Page 54 Page 55 Page 56 Page 57 Page 58 Page 59 Page 60THIS IS THIRTY T his year I had the privilege of turning thirty. As I reflect on the experiences I had in my twenties, I can genuinely say that attending Greensboro Day School prepared me well for adulthood. While my younger self may not have recognized the importance of some of the values faculty and staff at Greensboro Day School worked hard to instill in the student body, I certainly do now. Looking back on my early twenties, I remember a mentor of mine telling me her “twenties were hard.” Being the overly- confident young person I was, I remember thinking “well THAT sucks, that won’t be me.” To my dismay however, I quickly learned that my twenties would be hard too and I would need to draw from the values taught to me in school and by my parents. While I don’t know what my thirties will hold, I made it through my twenties and I leave members of the Greensboro Day School community with a reminder of ten values taught at Greensboro Day School and how they can be applied to life as an adult. 1. OWNERSHIP. Regardless of whether you grew up with a silver spoon in your mouth or no spoon in your mouth because whoever raised you couldn’t afford one, once you reach your mid-twenties, you realize that YOU are the only one responsible for creating the life you want for yourself. Sure, having a great education, secure family unit, and a lot of money BY: WHITNEY MARSHALL may make attaining the life you want for yourself easier, but it may just as easily make it harder to branch out and do what you really want with your life. You have to accept that everything from your childhood, whether good or bad, is in the past and it is up to you to define and direct your future. Whatever it is that you can’t get over, get a therapist to help you work through it. It will only make it easier for you to create the life you envision for your future self. 2. SELF-CONFIDENCE. During times of crisis in my twenties, I realized that I had no choice but to go after what I really and truly wanted for myself deep down inside. I could either live in a deep dark state of wondering “what if” or make the choice to do what lights me up and makes me feel like my best self. It is often said that people’s lives are a reflection of the choices they have made. To me, people’s lives are a reflection of whether or not they have made the choice to listen to their “gut” or “inner guide.” It is definitely harder to listen to that voice sometimes, but it is always there. Building the self-confidence to surrender to that voice you don’t always want to listen to, but you know deep down is right, is one of the best things you can do for yourself. 3. DEPTH. Have an awesome job that allows you to feel like you are doing exactly what you need to do to get ahead in the career you want but you hate your job title? Suck it up…for now (unless you’ve been in the job for an excessive amount of time with no promotion). Focus on the substance- the fact that you love the day-to- day in your job; not the form- the job title. It is easy to get caught up in how things look on a surface level but if you dive into how it makes you feel, I guarantee you will feel more satisfaction with your life and in return, you will get the results you want faster. 4. FOCUS. Many of us have a tendency to avoid living in the present. We constantly think about the future and dwell on the past. Unless you’re doing a self-help workshop where you need to think about those things to analyze where you are in your life in the present moment, STOP. There are three things I came to accept in my twenties: 1) I cannot predict the future; 2) not being able to predict the future stresses me out; and 3) I do not like feeling stressed out. So how have I learned to avoid this stress? By focusing on finding the good in my daily tasks as I complete them. When in doubt, focus on doing a good job with the work right in front of you. What you are doing in the present moment will dictate your future. 5. HEALTH. In my lifetime I have seen people close to me and a number of our world’s thought leaders die because of illnesses they detected after it was too late. None of us knows when we will die, but I cannot encourage you enough to go to the doctor regularly and to take your health seriously. While having a solid family, great friends, and a great career are very important, none of that can be maintained if you are not in good health. 6. OPEN-MINDEDNESS. People aren’t always who you think they are. It is so easy to make snap judgements about people based on how they look. As someone who has admittedly made judgements about people and more often than not, been on the receiving end of snap judgements, I can honestly say they do more harm than good. Making snap judgements causes us to treat people differently depending on how positively or negatively we view what we think they are. Instead of assuming people have had certain life experiences because of how they look, I encourage you to view people as human before you view them as anything else. We all have a lot more in common than we may think. 7. FRIENDSHIP. To this day, many of my closest friends are friends I made at Greensboro Day School. The best friends, colleagues, and mentors I have are the people with whom I have genuinely connected. In my twenties I realized that genuine friendships are elastic. We meet people when we are going through similar life stages but as we get older, our life stages are not always in sync with one another and this is okay. People are affected by inevitable life events in different ways and you have to give people space and time to deal with things that happen in life. At the end of the day, you will find things you have in common again and bond over that. Until then, accept the person for who they are and determine if you want them in your life long-term. You are in control. 8. SELF-REFLECTION. Living in the era of social media, it is now easier than ever to compare your life to your peers. I’m not going to say you should not compare yourself to others. I think you should use comparison as a barometer to gauge how you think your life is going and what you can do to get yourself in a position to do what you want with your life. I also think allowing yourself to feel that pang of jealousy when you see someone’s cool LinkedIn profile or Snapchat pictures is a healthy thing that can allow you to correct your course. Those things that make you feel jealous make you feel that way for a reason. Figure out what that reason is and if it’s something you can change in your life then change it. If not, unfollow that person. 9. AUTHENTICITY. Whenever I ask people why they think their thirties have been better than their twenties, nine times out of ten, I get the same answer- “you are just more secure and you don’t care about what other people think as much.” I always thought that was B.S. but (gasp!) I actually think this is true. Yes, it’s about knowing who you are but more importantly, it’s about accepting who you are. It’s about accepting the things you don’t like about yourself and making the choice to either work on changing them or letting them be. It’s about accepting that you are good at certain things and learning to use your talents to your advantage. And most of all, it’s about accepting that when you embrace your strengths and weaknesses you are being your authentic self. When you are your authentic self, you allow yourself to create the life you have always wanted because you recognize who you are and what you need to be fulfilled. 10. POSITVITY. Positive thinking is real- enough said. Whitney Marshall ’04 is currently an attorney at TV One, a cable network serving more than 57 million households that offers a broad range of real-life and entertainment-focused original programming, classic series, movies, and music. Avery Ann Griffin, daughter of Rachel Bowden Griffin ’04 Jane Andrews Nelson Brantley and Andy Brantley. Son: “Tennant” Johnson Brantley, September 17, 2016. They reside in Raleigh, NC. “Tennant”Johnson Brantley, son of Jane Andrews Nelson Brantley ’04 and Andy Brantley ’04 Kayvon Hejazi and Jen Gibson were married on Saturday, October 15, 2016 at the Riverwood Manor in Harrisburg, NC. The wedding party included Aaron Hubbard ’04, Brian Mingia ’04 and Frank Bullock ’04. They honeymooned in Grenada in December and reside in Charlotte, NC. Kayvon Hejazi ’04 with his wife, Jen Lindsey Evans Adams is now the High School Ministry Coordinator at Myers Park Presbyterian Church in Charlotte, NC. Lindsey Evans Adams ’04 Britt Stevens Turner and Wesley Turner. Son: Easton Wesley Turner, December 1, 2016. They reside in Danville, VA. Easton Wesley Turner, son of Britt Stevens Turner ’04 2005 | Jordan Hinkley and Steve Calfee were married on Saturday, May 14, 2016 at the Blockade Runner in Wrightsville Beach, NC. The wedding party included Morgan Mayer ’05. They honeymooned in Bald Head Island and reside in Wilmington, NC. Jordan Hinkley Calfee ’05 with husband, Steve George Sondecker and Elizabeth Ohrt were married on June 18, 2016 at the MIT Endicott House in Dedham, MA. They honeymooned in Switzerland and reside in Hermosa Beach, CA and work for SpaceX. q CLASSNOTES 48 | Winter 2017 GDS Magazine | 49